Friday, March 17, 2006


Thank you all for your amazing words, your love, hugs, and support. I have shared them all with my husband, and he was truly touched. It's amazing the community that we have developed, isn't it?

As with all deaths, they are so hard to process, and difficult to understand. The blood just drains from our hearts -- but a suicide is so much more difficult to grasp. It feels like the tears come in waves, and the questions follow closely. Why? Why? Why? Our cousin had been struggling with depression for a couple years now. He was always reaching for the "shock factor" -- what can I do that will shock everyone -- His life was a spinning wheel with no grounding. For a while, he worked in the same office with my husband, and my dear husband wanted so badly to reach out to him and be a role model to him, but his cousin abruptly quit the job he had held for 15 years. That alone should have been a warning, but it went un-heeded. We all question what we could have done, but really, there was nothing other than pray for him, and he had many MANY people doing just that.

In the end, he cut his life short at the age of 28, leaving behind a young wife, and three children. It's very sad, and difficult to process. But, slowly, hearts will heal. There will always be a rift, but hearts will heal.

The viewings are on Sunday (closed casket), and the funeral on Monday. Please, continue to remember us.

Finally, as usual, I will post a Friday Food Fun post ... it's a twist to a comfort food, and I will probably be baking it this weekend for family members... I hope you enjoy it.

Side note -- I noticed that I forgot to add the glaze recipe for the chocolate cherry bundt cake (last Friday). I'm so sorry for that... it's what MAKES THE CAKE... I noticed this, because it's the same glaze I use on this bread, and I wanted to cut and past it in... but it wasn't there! So, please amend your recipes to include the glaze below...

Banana Chocolate Chip Bread

1/2 cup margarine
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 tsp vanilla
2 cups flour
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup chopped nuts
3 ripe bananas, mashed
2/3 cup chocolate chips
2 eggs

Fudgy Chocolate Glazy-Frosting (you will not use all the glaze)

6 oz chocolate chips
about 2 Tbsp milk
1 Tbsp butter
About 1/4 cup powdered sugar

Cream together margarine and sugars. Beat in eggs, vanilla, and banana. Add flour and soda. Stir in chips and nuts. Bake in greased loaf pan for 50 minutes in 350-degree oven. Allow to sit in loaf pan for a few minutes (10) and then remove from pan onto a cooling rack.

After bread has cooled, drizzle with the glaze. I usually place a large spoon into the glaze, and then hold it over the bread and zig-zag it across the top of the bread. You won't want to glaze it too thickly.

Another thing I will do is double the recipe, and bake it in a bundt pan, pop it out of the pan, cool it, and glaze it as above. If you're in a hurry, and don't want to make it from scratch, or don't have ripe bananas on hand, just use one or two boxed bread mixes and add the chocolate to the batter. Bake as directed.

The chocolate in the recipe transforms this regular, everyday comfort food to a special, sweet snack or dessert. I promise your friends won't soon forget this!

I pray you all have a blessed weekend. Please know that I will hold all your words and scriptures close to my heart.


Kim from Hiraeth said...

Sigh. It is all so very sad. I am glad that your husband gained some measure of comfort from the thoughts and prayers that are going out and up on your behalf.

I'll be thinking of you this weekend and in the days and weeks to come.

sarahgrace said...

You and your family will be in my prayers continually. It's good that you are writing about it and getting it out, (but I think you already know that.) Thank you for sharing though, it helps us all know how to help you and pray for you all even better.

Heather from One Woman's World said...

Oh I am so sorry that you are going through this. It must be pain beyond what I can fathom. God bless your family.

Faith said...

Lifting you up in prayer.

Lauren said...

Yes GiBee, thank you for giving a little more background. I appreciate being able to specifically lift his wife and children up in prayer too.

This recipe looks delicious, another one to try. Thanks.

Kristen said...

I will continue to keep your family in my prayers...and I mean that. Suicide is so heartbreaking. I hope your husband can find some comfort this weekend.

The recipe sounds delicious! I might have to give it a try this weekend. :-)

Morning Glory said...

Still in my prayers.

Perri said...

I will be praying for you this weekend.

tam said...

Ohh the pain of it all. The children, the relationships. The thing about grief is only God and time eases it and the prayers of others say what we cannot.

I will be praying for you, your husband, and your cousins wife and children specifically.

Chaotic Mom said...

Hey, again, I'm very sorry for the loss in your family. You WILL remain on my little computer-side prayer list, too.

About your recipe, we LOVE banana chocolate chip muffins. I'll have to try this bread recipe today, sounds yummy! And I do have some bananas that look just about perfect for bread making today. ;)

momrn2 said...

Prayers continuing

Carol said...

Keeping you in my prayers. God will bring you all through this time. Such a terribly sad situation for all of you.