Lesson Learned

Saturday, the ladies from my church met for our monthly Bible study. It was lovely, with a delicious spread of breakfast foods.

I learned a very valuable lesson I thought I'd pass on to the masses... just in case you didn't already know.

When you take your 18-month old to a Bible study with you, and he hasn't had his ... morning poop, be forewarned that you might get distracted by the smell your child is emitting, and it's possible, that if you happened to bring a 32-ounce cup of diet coke, you might knock it all over the hardwood floors that belong to your nice friend that graciously opened her home to you. For Bible study. Not child care. All because of a slightly distracting smell from your kids pants.

But, in all fairness, I thought I'd share with you what I learned at the Bible study. First, the leader had us write ... stuff ... on a few index cards. The cards were very pretty, and my son liked the colors. But then, he was soon distracted by the kiddy kitchen set up with nice kiddy plates, and kiddy flatware... all of which equal ... lots of kiddy noise when dropped on previously mentioned hard wood floors... while the leader is trying to speak.

We then moved on to an actually study ... about something ... most likely prayer, because there was a book involved called What Happens When Women Pray, which fortunately, I read prior to loosing my mind with child birth, confirming in my mind that the lesson was indeed about prayer. I chased my son around, who was LOVING being in a new and exciting place, with lots and lots of new toys that he managed to noisily clank around, and was also attracted by ... are you ready for this ... BLING. He loved the little girls big purpley-blue necklace which draped down to his knees. But my friend had wisely made arrangements with her husband to watch the kids away from the home. Something I should have considered (and in all fairness, was warned by my husband).

Then my mother in law took over for a little while, thank goodness! I actually got to participate in sharing prayer requests! Yay! Five minutes of grown-up time. Until, of course, my son became a distraction, and again, I had to take him out, and missed the prayer time.

All in all, I would say -- I learned nothing Biblical. I don't remember a word the leaders said. I didn't even get to join them in prayer ... making the 3 and 1/2 hours I spent in my friends home a complete waste of time.

And -- I left with a nervous twitch in my right eye, and in desperate need of a nap.

Lesson learned: Never go to Bible study with a child. Ever. Unless they are not walking yet, because then, I'm pretty sure you're safe.

And don't take your own soft drinks, as they pose a threat to hardwood floors everywhere.